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There are some advantages to being married for 15+ years. Like you can scare your wife with the cardboard figure you found buried in the garage that she bought you five years ago.

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There are some advantages to being married for 15+ years. Like you can scare your wife with the cardboard figure you found buried in the garage that she bought you five years ago.

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  1. Well that takes me back… dateline: sometime in 1990. Location: Tucson, Arizona. For the Super Bowl that year Budweiser had a set of commercials leading up the Super Bowl for The Bud Bowl where [bottles formed teams](https://img.buzzfeed.com/buzzfeed-static/static/2014-01/campaign_images/webdr03/29/10/the-definitive-bud-bowl-rankings-1-8789-1391010503-5_big.jpg) for Bud and Bud Light. I think the winner was going to be “crowned” during a Super Bowl commercial. The bar I worked at was running a promotion and had life-size cutouts of the Bud Bowl Bottle Player, essentially 6′ tall oddly shaped bottle player and I took one home, Bud Light, if memory serves.

    It wasn’t long before my roommate and I started to do horrible things to one-another with that damn bottle (that sounds awful). In our rooms, if lying in bed, your feet would be towards a window so we began to sneak into one another’s room and we’d place the bud bowl bottle at the foot of the bed. Let me tell you it is absolutely terrifying to wake up from a dead sleep and catch sight of a burly silhouette standing at the foot of the bed backlit by the window.

    The fun stopped one night when I didn’t know he had one of his lady friends in bed with him and she woke up at some point that night, caught sight of Bud Bowl Man and freaked the f out. Screaming, crying, crying-screaming. Police were called by neighbors, it was a mess. I took Bud Man to the dumpster that night, tore him up, and threw him away.

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