I really like ogling girls and porn. Am I addicted?

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I need to discover out if I’m hooked on girls. I used to spend as much as one and a half hours a day on the lookout for girls in underwear on Instagram, and on the lookout for movies on pornography web sites so I may stimulate myself. I would do that day-after-day; is that regular male behaviour or the signal of an dependancy? I’ve a girlfriend and actually love her, however discover it tough not to have a look at different girls once we are strolling collectively on the road, for instance.

I desire to make use of the time period “sexual compulsion” reasonably than “dependancy”, as a result of in contrast to many different issues to which one can turn into addicted, intercourse is basically a wholesome exercise. However some individuals compulsively interact in a lot intercourse that it has a detrimental impact on their life, work or relationship. Nonetheless, from what you say, I don’t see that it is a vital downside for you. Actually, your curiosity in girls and magnificence of masturbation appear regular and customary for a younger man – and you’re removed from the one particular person on the planet who has to attempt arduous to not be caught ogling somebody enticing whereas strolling on the road with a girlfriend or boyfriend. You’ve gotten requested an vital query, although, and in case your obsession with intercourse and compulsion to make use of porn escalated to the purpose the place they had been taking on many extra hours and inflicting actual issues in your life typically, that will be the time to take steps to get them underneath management.

• Pamela Stephenson Connolly is a US-based psychotherapist who specialises in treating sexual problems.

• If you need recommendation from Pamela Stephenson Connolly on sexual issues, ship us a quick description of your considerations to non-public.lives@theguardian.com (please don’t ship attachments). Submissions are topic to our phrases and circumstances: see gu.com/letters-terms

• Feedback on this piece are premoderated to make sure dialogue stays on matters raised by the author. Please bear in mind there could also be a brief delay in feedback showing on the positioning.

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